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The Wilkinson Effect

Life Coach Programs & Courses For Women Seeking Empowerment

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My Story

I was 12 years old when my parents’ marriage started to fall apart. It was a really awkward time in my life because I was a pre-teen and a Christian. The members of the church that my family went to were like a second family to me. My best friends.                                                                                                                                    

My life split into two, actually it felt like it split into three. It was ugly. I became an outcast to my church family when my parents divorced. My dad's drug use became apparent as his behavior changed drastically from a gentle, attentive father, to a man who was unpredictable and scary. I didn't know him.

It felt like everyone could see through me. I lost faith in my belief system during that time. I felt incredibly judged by the people I thought loved me. I felt like they knew all of the scary secrets of what was happening in my life during that time. I felt undeserving of love. I felt like I was on the outside of life looking in on everyone's normalcy and happiness. I was an interloper.

I had two stepfathers that confirmed this story of me being undeserving. They were unpredictable and scary. You know that feeling of "Am I just putting out some kind of vibration to attract this or something?" I felt completely misunderstood by everyone.

By my late teens, early twenties I was really depressed and feeling pretty numb. My relationships with guys were dysfunctional. I developed PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). The sadness I felt was so heavy and ugly, I didn't want to look at it. I felt like I was a victim of my life. I ended a relationship with my boyfriend at the time and decided to just concentrate on loving myself. I didn't want to feel dependent on anyone or feel stuck in any relationships in my life.

I started loving myself. I held down three part time jobs, as a caregiver, a cook and a waitress. I started caring less about what other people thought and just did what made me happy, it was liberating. It was during this time that I stopped looking for love outside of myself that love found me. I met my husband. Handsome, attentive, caring and as "luck" would have it he was growing through some of the same things as I was. I made a decision during that time that I didn't want to be numb to my life anymore. Even if it hurt like hell, I wanted to feel something.

We married and soon after had a baby. It really threw us for a loop when suddenly we had the realization that we were parents. We were the caregivers of our child and we were the ones to decide how we would raise our son. We started setting boundaries in our life in new ways. We weren't just protecting ourselves anymore, we were protecting our child. We were drawing a line in the sand and saying what was acceptable in life and what wasn't.

As I was seven months pregnant with our second child, my husband and I decided we should relocate our family from California to Arizona to share a house with a married couple who were our closest friends. Two very short months later we made a difficult decision to move back to California. No longer friends with the couple we moved in with. We were totally bankrupt, zero money.  Actually we were in debt at that time to friends and family who loaned us the money that we needed to move back. I was nine months pregnant with our second child and our other son was almost two years old. We moved in temporarily with my sister, her husband and their daughter.

 I felt incredibly vulnerable, horribly scared of how we were going to re-stabilize our life and have a newborn baby. I felt numb. All of the big scary thoughts were too much for me to handle that far in my pregnancy. I couldn't allow myself to go there, I had to concentrate on my family. So much suppressed fear and sadness. I felt like the universe was re-confirming once again that I was undeserving. I felt like I had once again lost everything. Everything felt fake. Even my closest relationships.

 Within 1 incredibly short and at the same time very long year, we were homeless twice, in debt and found out that my mom had breast cancer. When I say in debt I don't just mean our savings was dry. I mean our credit cards were mostly maxed out from the costs of living and we were getting most of our groceries from the food bank. No, we weren't 'sucking off of the government', we sold nearly everything we owned that had value. So undeserving.

 It was during this time that I really broke. I felt like giving up. I can't even begin to describe the horrible sadness and anger that I felt. I thought "There has to be something more than this! This can't be it. This isn't my life. I refuse to accept this." During this point of my life I started using E.F.T. (Emotional Freedom Technique).

 I knew something had to change in my life quickly, so I enrolled in a program at a private college for Healing Arts. I didn't tell anyone what I was doing before I enrolled. I didn't need anyone's permission and I knew in my heart that this was what I needed to do. I wanted to become a Life Coach and Transpersonal Hypnotherapist. I needed to transform my life.

 I learned the tools and skills that I needed in order to heal myself completely. A little bit of a slap in the face was when I had the realization that I was putting out a vibration to the universe that was attracting all of these hurtful and depressing things into my life. I accepted some of them as a part of my life path that brought me to where I needed to be in order for me to learn from them and become the woman that I am. 

 After accepting and honoring my past, I made the choice to re-write the story of my life. The moment of power in our life is always in the present moment. So I began my new story with where I was. I began to write the story of my life by claiming with certainty the following:

 "I am a wife. I am a mother. I am a healer by nature. I am a successful Mind-Body Wellness Practitioner who specializes in Reiki, Life Coaching, Hypnotherapy and Holistic Nutrition. I make a generous amount of money and I help people. My family is loving. We have a stable home and more than enough money for the things that we want/need in life. We have fun and enjoy one another. My husband is a machinist. He is successful and loves his career. We own a home together and have created it as a representation of how we live our life together and how we want to create our world. We are healthy and happy together. We are committed to each other and honor one another. My family and I are able to communicate in loving ways that allow us to express ourselves and our needs. We are safe and supported by one another. We trust. We are kind. We are gentle. We are present in the moment and able to go with the flow of life. This is my new life."

 I printed out my new story and posted it above my kitchen sink where I read it several times a day. Initially it felt so far out of reach from my reality. But every day I kept re-affirming my new life. Every day I worked my tail off studying in my classes and doing my own inner work. Then the evidence started showing up in my life that my new story was becoming my current reality. I earned my certificate as a Life Coach, then my certificate as a Transpersonal Hypnotherapist, then as a Holistic Nutrition Specialist, then I completed school with a 4.0 GPA, blood, sweat and a lot of tears, earning my diploma as a Mind-Body Practitioner.

 I changed the story of my life and I claimed it as truth. I trained myself to keep my focus on the present moment. It didn't come without effort and a lot of practice. I incorporated all of the tools and practices that I had learned during my training to change my conscious and subconscious patterns. Within 2 years I was able to accomplish more with these tools than I had been able to do on my own or with the guidance from past counselors. I learned to heal myself. It has been a process. Nothing worthwhile comes with instant gratification. Healing is a process. Life Mastery comes as progress.

Blessings,

 

Coming in August to The Wilkinson Effect:

Open Enrollment for The Empath Mastery Program

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A 6 week self paced e-course:

                                                       

*Early Bird Specials are honored and mailed during the first week the course begins.

*This blog post is sponsored by this Affiliate link for Ruzuku an easy to use course creation platform. Ruzuku hosts videos, audio, webinars, pdfs and text lessons all within its site! They even offer you a free trial period! Thanks to Ruzuku I am working on building some fabulous courses for you to help you escape life crisis patterns that have kept you stuck in your spiritual path. I am personally committed to teaching you how to re-program your mind in a way that is easy and fun so that you can become a miraculous healer!

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